At 3-1/2 years

Silas is over 3-1/2 years old now and I was just thinking today about how his personality is developing. I wonder if these things I see developing in him today will flourish or flounder, and if it reflects what kind of man he'll be. Of course, life is really going to change for him in a short while, what with baby brother coming along any day now. In what ways is becoming an older brother going to change him? I thought I would write down things that I see in him today to remind myself once he's older and his personality is more developed.


Here are a few things that I've noticed in him:


- He really likes us to spend time with him. While this is probably a given in most children, I see it more so in Silas. The most poignantly I've seen this is while he's watching a video. He often asks us to sit next to him while watching one. He also really enjoyed (past tense since Christian has now finished college!!) doing activities in the office while Christian was hard at work on an essay. He didn't disturb Christian, but he liked to be in the same room with him.


- He likes to save things for later, even candy. I never grasped this concept as a child, but Silas has. He knows that if he doesn't eat all of his candy now, he can enjoy it again later. Of course, sometimes things are too tempting to save, like "Starvers" (Starbursts), which he managed to save for about an hour today.

- He loves certain vegetables. Broccoli is his favorite, but he'll eat celery, carrots, lettuce, and even brussel sprouts if he has to. But don't try to get a tomato or a mushroom down him. Okay, so this isn't really a personality trait but it's still impressive!


- He's very cautious. This might be my fault because I'm pretty cautious, as well. But I don't have to worry about him climbing up some tree or other and thinking, "Hmm, I wonder if I can make it if I jump?" I know he's not going to do this on his own, but we'll see how peer pressure affects him. He didn't want to ride on the 4-wheeler with Dad and me at first, but he got used to it and even enjoyed himself (especially once he found out Blake liked to ride it).


- He doesn't like loud. Especially loud children. Loud noises in general he will get used to, but loud children repel him (unless they're friends and he's a part of it). This often means he doesn't like the park, because the kids are yelling and screaming.

- He enjoys playing with older boys. Blake's his absolute favorite. Hands down, he will do just about anything Blake wants to do. This is a good thing, as Blake is a wonderful kid. And I'm not biased because he's my brother :) He also really likes Jakin and Jed, who are more than 6 years older than him. It helps that all of these boys are super sweet in playing with him either on his level or letting him be a part of whatever they are doing.


- He can be sensitive sometimes. I once said, "You silly boy" in response to him making a mistake and he got his feelings hurt. He doesn't like it when I cry. But he's not overly sensitive. He has no problem when Christian calls him a dookiehead or bonk-face, realizing it's in jest. And if he's not the cause of my crying, he just gives me a funny look, maybe coming and giving me a hug.

- He likes music. He's not too big on singing, but he enjoys listening to music of almost any kind and even has styles for his moods. He already associates music with things or memories. He recognizes Tchaikovsky's Nutcracker Suite as the music to a Tom and Jerry cartoon he saw over six months ago, with certain parts for Tom and certain parts for Jerry. He picks up words to songs pretty quick when they're put to music and has a harder time when it's a capella (or maybe it's Mommy's inability to carry a tune that causes him to struggle...)


There are other things I see in him that I consider to be his behavior and have either been molded by us or will be molded by us. These are things like not wanting to share, having a giving heart, wanting things his way, being thankful, etc. How quickly he adapts to the molding will, I think, be a better statement about his personality.

My main problem with writing these things down is that I loathe labels and putting people in boxes. I don't want to be too quick to label my son as being a certain way, ever. While defining our personalities and traits can be a good thing and help us understand our strengths and weaknesses, I often find it just leads to excuses. Doing this to my children too quickly could lead to a lot of confusion for them. Most importantly, though, is that as we (hopefully) become more and more Christ-like, these definitions and labels I've made for myself and my family should be stripped away so that we can operate in any area God has us. Ideally, that is...